Wadjabunbum?!

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Grandma just sat down, munching on pretzel rods and I’m eyeing her enviously. What did I eat today? A apple…And when was that? Did I take my prescription? Didn’t drink enough water – did you?That bag keeps crinkling and I’m trying my very best to stay away from bread.

OH BREADYGOODNESS!

Starchy from Adventure Time

STARCHY ARE YOU REALLY MY FRIEND?!

Why must you take up residence on my bottom and thighs!?…Actually I like my fat ass. Today when I was waddling down to Walgreens I heard and then saw the guy behind me snap a couple shots! I hope he doesn’t photo edit with one of those ‘baby on board’ logos or ‘WIDE LOAD’. Meh – I think I want grilled cheese.

AlI have to do is get up and make it. Get up. Get up or sit here and starve. Go mad listening to grandma gnaw on the crunchy pretzel rod, watch her get crumbs ALL OVER. Apple. Go eat another fucking apple – or a potato. Sure its natural carbs, but its not bread.

I ♥ you Starchy!

‘(` ; A ; ´)’

Guess I’ll be a big girl and feed myself…What that is, I have no clue.

-Bad touch bear

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